The Nightmare Men
- Commitment Phobe
- Date Rapist
If you are shopping for men online. Here is a RED FLAG! Don’t reply to this one. He got some woman pretty upset!
The Nightmare Men we HAVE to AVOID! Run for the hills, don’t look back, even if one of your favorite pair of Jimmy Choo heels have fallen as you scramble through the bushes. Sacrifice it, before you sacrifice your sanity from any of these four misery makers.
He will look at you as nothing but a RESOURCE. So long as you offer him any sort of benefit, whether it be material goods, a free place to stay, satisfy his ego, unwittingly help him keep up his pretentious act with society etc… whatever his selfish agenda of the day happens to be if you can provide it, then watch out!
He will “love bomb” you in the beginning. All the Nightmare Men do! If the attention and phone calls are a little over the top at the beginning, take that as a definite RED FLAG! Do not get blinded by the flattery! He will use methods to make you feel like you are even greater than the invention of sliced bread. Do not let your guard down. Remember he has an agenda!
He will mirror you (basically imitate you, if were adopted, then so was he), copy your body language etc… Give you some sob story about his life and try to find out as many of your vulnerabilities as he can, pretend to be sympathetic to them and use them against you later.
Be aware this individual has NO FEELINGS except possibly self pity for his own pain and emptiness. However, never for yours! Sociopaths are very jealous, they even envy the fact that we can feel and they cannot. He will charm you, lie to you, cheat on you, steal from you and possibly worse. There are many different types of sociopaths and different degrees in their evil. Even the type categorized at the least harmful IS HARMFUL!
REMEMBER you CAN’T CHANGE OR CURE THEM! You are dealing with a DEMON who lacks any kind of soul or empathy, enjoys watching you suffer, most likely has some sort of severe addiction – drugs, alcohol or gambling. Nightmare Men are completely fake people!
Feeling sorry for a sociopath is like feeling sorry for Richard Ramirez bumping his knee as he crawled through somebody’s window to murder them.
Well, you can feel sorry, but keep on walking, sister! HE WILL HURT YOU!
The Commitment Phobe
This one is a ball of fun, again in the beginning. The hunt is on and so long as there is a chase, homeboy is down! He will smother you with attention, act cute and vulnerable and you will be the center of his world. That is until he has you! GAME OVER! Now he will freak out and no longer want you.
It’s like a cat chasing a mouse, catches it and then gets anxiety on what he is supposed to do with it. The mouse will end up very upset, and possibly end up chasing the cat to try and question why his time and energy was wasted in the first place. The mouse will never get a straight answer!
When the CP has had enough of toying with you, that charming considerate guy will abruptly disappear. The best warning you can get when this is about to happen is that things will be going really well. You feel closer than ever to him. He will then start being very elusive, not returning your calls and doing things to upset you to make you break up with him. He can’t even commit to that! You are totally confused and text him more and end up feeling like a pathetic stalker for communicating the same way you did with him before.
He will do what ever he can to upset you to the point that you will break up with him. SO DO IT! When you realize you are in this situation, the harder you try to work things out with him, the faster he will run. And you will be left feeling even worse. It can be a very heartbreaking experience, but don’t waste your time. There is a reason why he left.
The cold hard truth is that he is BORED with you and things were becoming too relationship like. He always feels that there is a “better” woman around the corner and with his freedom feeling challenged, that jeopardizes his chances of getting her. He is already on a new hunt, and too wishy washy to deal with cleaning up the mess of his previous conquest, which would be you. He will without warning avoid you or start picking on your flaws and leave you shocked and with a broken heart.
Nice guy, huh!
This type of guy I believe is a form of a sociopath. A sociopath is incurable, apparently a CP can get help, should he want it. Very rarely he will. He likes his life the way it is and he will do the same thing to this next girl he has left you for. She still won’t be good enough, what if somebody better than her comes around! He is somewhat evil in my opinion in the fact that he knows he is going to dump you from the beginning. Of course he won’t tell you that because why would you want even want to go out with him! I think that is particularly cruel and very premeditating.
Towards the end, his cowardly way of trying to get rid of you should make him seem a lot less attractive. You look for some kind of compassion from him but all you will get is annoyance and avoidance. A very selfish and using individual. He has mommy issues or some woman hurt him so bad he can NEVER RECOVER! Don’t feel sorry for this one either, he actually is able to feel, so lacks empathy even worse than the sociopath. Because he actually understands what pain feels like!
The Date Rapist
Watch your drink ladies! This one will fill it with some kind of benzodiazepine! Or he may over power you. Remember, rape is not about lust, it’s about control and power. He doesn’t force you because he thinks you are the most beautiful girl on the planet and he has to have you. He forces you because he feels so pathetic and inadequate in his own life.
Completely feeling like he has no control over anything is his life, he will seek it over the one thing he can have control over, you! He will seem like a normal guy too, a serious wolf in sheeps clothing. Watch very carefully for the RED FLAGS with any man you have just met.
Are you getting drunk and he isn’t! But he is refreshing your glass! Or his he drinking just a bit too much! Do not put yourself in any position of vulnerability. It is dangerous. You need to have your wits aware. Don’t let him separate you from friends, take you to any secluded place, if he seems to put people down, gets angry over something trivial like not enough ice in his beverage etc… Just always go with your gut instinct. It is there for a reason and is generally right.
Keep in mind that three percent of guys you meet on the internet are serial killers. Not a huge percentage but somebody is going to be a victim of that small percentage. There are some truly sick people out there. Always be on guard with new men that you meet and until you get to really know them, never let it down!
The main signs are severely over inflated egos, a strong sense of self entitlement, an overwhelming need for the admiration of others, very flakey, often throw temper tantrums when they don’t get their way, major users, very judgemental of others.
Internally, their self esteem is pretty much wrecked. Thus, they use and rely on the flattery of others to keep feeling good about themselves. Sounds like a really fun guy to date – IT WILL ALL BE ABOUT HIM! Again, they will probably charm your socks of when you first meet them.
Four of these monsters pretty much overlap each other with very minor differences in certain characteristics. As you are looking for Mr. Right, make sure you don’t attract a Nightmare Man. He a predator all over the place. Certain dating sites are his favorite hunting ground. Consider him a bloodhound with a sixth sense. He will seek you out if you are not emotionally and mentally armed. He won’t bother trying if you are!