The SILENT TREATMENT is a refusal to communicate verbally with someone who desires communication. It may range from just sulking to malevolent abusive controlling behavior.
GHOSTING is breaking off a relationship by stopping all communication and contact with the partner without any apparent warning or justification, as well as ignoring the partner’s attempts to reach out or communicate.
Silent Treatment, Ghosting, Stonewalling… Who cares what you call it! It boils down to the same thing. A person you care for is ignoring you as if you never even existed…
EVIL may be a harsh word. However, it is not harsh enough if you contemplate the dynamic behind the behavior of this person.
They are deliberately causing you pain and humiliation and they don’t care.
Worst of all when they are done punishing you (if they come back) they WILL do it again.
Each time it will be for a longer period. Right now they testing you see how far they can push you and exactly what you will do just to hear their precious voice again.
It is a LOSE LOSE battle! Because the harder you try the greater the contempt and lack of respect they will have towards you.
You probably don’t believe this now if you are currently on the receiving end of this.
However, if they don’t come back, that will be the BEST THING they have ever done for you!
This is one very ABUSIVE, TOXIC and COWARDLY individual. Is there really anything sexy about that?
Before you give in to that urge to call him, think about what he is probably doing right now. Chances are he has made you feel like YOU HAVE DONE SOMETHING WRONG to cause this!
Absolute crap – he is just playing a game so that he can get whatever HE WANTS at this moment!
WHY IS HE SILENT?
He met SOMEBODY ELSE but wants to keep you as back up for when nobody else is around.
He is too much of a COWARD do deal with your emotions through breaking up with you in person.
He is simply plain BORED with you.
He is trying to PUNISH you and/or control your behavior. Perhaps you were too needy, so this is his way of letting you know that you aren’t that important to him.
Silence is a common tactic used by a NARCISSIST or a SOCIOPATH. However, it could just be a selfish lame person in general.
Either way, the only thing that is important here is that THEY DON’T CARE ABOUT YOU!
This truly a horrible thing to go through and the pain can be agonizing. It can even become physical! You are not alone in being treated this way. It has and will be done to many people before and after you. The only way these tormentors can lose their power is if you DON’T RESPOND.
Nobody can ignore you if you don’t notice or pay attention to it right!
It has happened to me and I used to beg, plead and cry only serving to give them complete satisfaction to their childish nonsense. Plus, they got to ignore me longer because they knew as long as I was reacting that I wasn’t going anywhere!
They normally were guilty of something and instead of apologizing they took the easy way out and somehow I would end up apologizing to them!
I can’t tell you how good it felt when I finally understood the mindset behind these people and I was finally free of it.
You will know with a normal person with feelings if you have done something to upset them. You won’t have to sit there and second guess yourself.
Things are usually smoothed out in time with a sincere apology. Their feelings might be hurt and you know why but they are not out to punish you or be sadistic.
Compare the situation of when you briefly fell out with a friend and what you are going through right now. Think of the details – what happened, what was said and what happened when you reached out to communicate.
Your true friend would not be making you feel this horrible right now, upset with you or not. The sadistic narcissist/sociopath is without even putting in any effort. And going on quite happily with his life!
Love yourself enough to do the same and go on with yours!