Has eBay made you CRAZY!

Having sold on eBay for many years even after having my account indefinitely suspended numerous times I am for some reason a masochist.  I am completely addicted to this site and I just cannot move past it.

Image result for ebay dollar sign

This year I dealt with two of the dumbest scammers.  A woman trying to return a vacuum claiming it to be faulty and missing pieces.  She sent me a photo of  her evidence. There was a vacuum in the picture, definitely a good start.  What lost her case was the fact that she sitting in the background staring angrily at the offending appliance holding a meth pipe in her hand!

Meth Pipe

The second charming buyer had purchased a used $20 computer monitor that he decided he didn’t want.  I even worked with him, giving him a $10 refund to avoid the hassle letting him keep it.  That was not good enough for him. 

He bombarded my inbox with weird and disturbing messages that had nothing to do with a monitor.  I was a monkey who had escaped from the zoo and needed to return to my cage, MAGA, vote Trump 2020, and then the weirdo  proceeded to hit on me.

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Wouldn’t eBay close down his account by now?  Nope.  Trust and Safety informed me after my many complaints that “this was strictly against eBay’s policy and their team was thoroughly investigating the situation.”  The team being what, two computer nerds in a tiny office warning him with an “Um stop that”! 

And what exactly did they have to “investigate”?  This creep with my personal address had already done all the work for them.  What is clearer then the direct correspondence sent through eBay’s own system!  End result, his account remained in tact without so much as a blemish!

Ten ANNOYING things about eBay!

Fashion Photography of Woman Holding Smartphone in Blue Denim Dress Shirtr

1. Time Wasted on the Phone!

Half the time spent on the phone with an eBay agent could be cut down into another half of that if they were not required to come back every two minutes and ask us if we would mind holding for another two minutes. No, I have waited an hour already.  There is no way I am waiting two more whole minutes for the solution!

2. The Hold Music

As much as I have enjoyed jamming to the same tune on eBay for the last ten years. I now demand that use my seller fees to purchase a different song. I will take anything! Barry Manilow,  Englebert Humperdinck,  Gary Glitter…

Image result for gary glitter

3. Horrible Seller Photos

It is really gross when people take photos of clothing they want to sell lying all over their filthy smoke stained carpet.  Then actually list them as “new without tags!

From New Jersey?  Please don't beat me up in a dark alley :(

What is more heinous to the eye sight is when these people model the item themselves.  Throwing it on and not bothering to change into something that might actually match or complement what they are trying to sell!

Worn Bra - STERILIZE IT FIRST, THEN THOW IT IN THE DUMPSTER in your trailer park.

Also  if it has squished into intimate crevices of your body, it is not new because you left the tag attached.

4. Seller Secrets

How did somebody sell some used Tupperware for $11,000?   I can’t sell new Tupperware for $11.00!  This long ongoing scheme where everyone else is selling an iPhone at $600 and one guy sells his at $4500 has me stumped.

Image result for ebay dollar sign

And, China, how do you sell anything for an auction that starts at one penny, and then offer free shipping? 

5. Any Excuse for a Selfie

Where the younger generation use Instagram and Snap chat to show off their selfies.  Where is a good showground for the slighty older?  You guessed it.  And for those still holding their cell phone up in the bathroom, the camera has a reverse button.

6. Item not as Described

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 Is it ever?  They have photographs to look at.  Do we need to write a two page essay here. This is every eBay seller’s worst nightmare and every eBay buyer’s favorite reason to scam.  

7. The New Buyer

No, no, no!!!  Not the one with 0 percent feedback who suddenly orders the most expensive item in your inventory.  We already know what is going to happen, but we are forced to ship!

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It was my pleasure to learn to be a better seller thanks to this buyer.  I don’t mind the negative feedback or, the free product I gave him along with his money back.  I understand that his terrible buyer experience nearly scared him and his multiple accounts away from eBay.  

Man in White Mask in Black Crew Neck Shirt and Blue Zip Up Jacket Infront Graffiti Wall

8. The Charge Backer

No we are not talking about football.  We are discussing the very definition of  the eBay snake!  He plays a sneaky game.  He will bypass eBay, leap right over Paypal and fall straight into the loving arms of his credit card company who will pat him on the head and reward him with a brand new and absolutely free laptop.

Shallow Focus Photography of Gray Snake With Black Tongue

 9. The Best Offer Guy

I don’t want to sell you a $100 item for $10.  Nor do I want to include free shipping in the deal.  Would you like it hand delivered it on a silver platter along with a cocktail and  caviar!   I am not in this for philanthropic reasons.  

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Why do so many buyers think the average seller from home has a huge warehouse full of goods and can afford to sell it to them at a price where the shipping would far exceed the cost of the item!  Do they try asking Nordstrom to do the same thing?

 10. Indefinite Suspension

So indefinite means ” not definite; without fixed or specified limit;”   And suspension means “to come to a stop, usually temporarily; cease from operation for a time. 

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Those two dreaded words have brought grown men to their knees in tears.  Their whole livelihood suddenly destroyed by some a**hole bitching over something trivial and having to prove that he is in the right.  You make the mistake of putting your foot down, but in the world of eBay, circumstances are limited in which a seller can just say NO to a buyer without suffering repercussions.   

So back to this indefinite suspension notice.  You call and say okay fine, what can I do to fix this and when will I be reinstated?  ” Nothing and Never” they reply.  “Customers are dissatisfied”.  Why, because they had to pay for their item? But surely there must be something I can do, reduce my selling limit, please give me a second chance, I have 99% feedback and only two defects! “Nothing we can do the system won’t let us override it” Call your IT department then!  Click.

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Damn eBay! So how long does this indefinite period of time go on for again?”  Are we talking about our future lives as well? Do we hand this curse down from generation to generation?  Moral of the story,  it’s totally possible so just don’t get suspended from eBay!  People say there is life after eBay.  Other platforms to make money.  It’s a lie, time to get yourself a stealth account!

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