- Meet Mr Right
- Keep Mr Right
- Stay away from Mr Tight (meaning his wallet)!
- Avoid Toxic Jerks (the Nightmare Men) that break our hearts.
In order to be successful in any of the above, we must LEARN HOW TO UNDERSTAND MEN!
So how do we understand men when it seems they don’t even understand themselves?
We never will! For some reason, this universe was designed to be a cruel battle between the sexes! The good news is that we can at least make this war as pleasant as possible. It does not have to be all about hurt feelings, jealousy, and broken hearts.
You can choose between waking up in his arms with a smile on your face or going to bed crying and alone! However, we need to make smart decisions with the men we pick, the way we treat them and the way we let them treat us. It is common knowledge in life that you teach others how to treat you!
Wouldn’t it be great if your love life was always in the Honeymoon Phase! One big dreamy waltz with an inflated ego and a cheesy nineties Meg Ryan look on your face!
Sadly, that look doesn’t last for very long. Once they get us, they have us! The thrill of the chase is going to inevitably die.
CAUTION!!! Staleness and Monotony Lie Ahead!
Remember those heart-pounding romance novels with Fabio spreading his goods all over the cover. There is a hidden chapter at the end. In this one, Fabio will fart loudly after sex, bitch over a few dishes, throw his jeans in the washer in one big tangle with his belt and underwear. Great, so now he remembers to put his jeans on, when did that even happen!
Mentally, men and women are so different, we might as well just be different species.
We try so hard to figure out men that we end up like frustrated little hamsters running on a wheel, finally reaching exhaustion and then complete confusion because we are right back where we started!
Let’s get off that wheel and cover some bare basics of this not so rare but very mysterious species named man!
Yes, they are and our own actions seriously affect them more than you think! We don’t notice because they are not always great communicators. If you love him, it’s okay to show it! Do some really boring things with him that he enjoys. Sit through that really stupid action movie with him and make appropriate grunts of appreciation when a car flips and goes up in flames! It is a way of connecting and becoming closer. How many times has he sat holding a pile of clothes for you outside the dressing room of Forever 21!
Nothing kills a relationship, if you don’t have a connection. No connection = No Relationship!
Men can be jerks, but worthy ones will work hard to win you! We forget they have to put a lot more effort into getting us with expensive dinners, phone calls, figuring out how to please us etc… as we prance around like princesses. That’s a lot of work!
Show him the appreciation for even the littlest thing he does, down to cleaning the bathtub without being asked. And watch he will start doing it more and more for you! He does actually want to make you happy!
Men really do love recognition for what they do for you. It is the key to making them feel needed and loved.
We never seem to get this one! If somebody is upset, doesn’t it make sense to talk about it and solve the issue? Especially when we are all bawling our eyes out!
Men NEED their time alone to think. They can’t always handle our overflow of emotions and it will make them angry! They are truly frustrated that they have failed us somehow. So let them be!
Cool down, vent to your girlfriend and don’t text him incessantly. Which I see every woman do, including myself. At this time, you probably don’t think that they are thinking about us, but they really are!
We want to talk about problems, men want to solve them!
When he is ready to talk, he will do so, but he needs to do so with positive feelings. Otherwise, he will shut down and wall up! Problem not solved, problem reoccurs!
They Don’t Talk About Feelings
Men are brought uр tо keep thеіr еmоtіоnѕ within thеіr hеаrt. This very simple, let him show you he loves you! Stop obsessing over that one night last Wednesday when he left for work and forgot to shout “love you” as he left. Their love truly is in their actions and as we all know actions speak louder than words!
Accept that Conflict is Inevitable
We can find ways to fix this as much as possible. For example, inѕtеаd of nаggіng оvеr hоuѕеhоld issues, mаkе a tо dо lіѕt tо rеmіnd him of general tasks. He is not always being lazy, hіѕ mind is most likely preoccupied with something other than unloading the dishwasher.
It’s nothing new that men and women do not think alike. How boring if so. I hate to say it but we need a little drama/pressure to keep your mate interested in wanting you. Otherwise, how boring would it all be? Compare watching a drippy romantic movie where the couple are happy for the entire hour and a half. No scenes to piss you off and think well at least he didn’t do that! Dancing through daisy fields, having picnics and no sexy secretary to distract him would put us all in a coma!
Plus relationships aren’t always going to be pretty. We all have those awesome “romantic nights” that wake us up with that smile on our face. Our hair and makeup were perfect. He actually noticed and he woke up happy that you…. need I say more! But there are going to be those “hot sweaty, are you seriously dripping on my hair, hurry up and finish and which one of us made that weird noise during… type nights” Always, awkward, but usually quickly forgotten.
As Yoda said:
“Nagging leads to conflict. Conflict leads to Anger. Anger leads to be being single with too many cats!”
I think he is referring to some kind of balance.
They are Terrible Multi-Taskers!
Well on occasion they can walk and chew gum simultaneously! However, they can’t listen to you and do something else at the same time. Don’t tell him during the final quarter of a football game, about your work day, fight with your mom or plans for a girls night out in two weeks. Use common sense, try before sex. You will undoubtedly have his attention then! He is going to listen because he loves you, not because he really is just as horrified that Monique bought the same pair of shoes you did!
He Won’t Stop Looking at Other Women!
NEVER GOING TO CHANGE!
Guess, this guy learned to stop doing that the hard way!
You cannot control another human being! Men are just visual creatures. It doesn’t mеаn thаt hе wishes hе соuld be wіth hеr, he just саn’t help hіmѕеlf. Try to take it less personally. Like the scorpion said to the toad “It’s in my nature”. Just remember he chose YOU because he thinks you are beautiful and loves you even with all your weird quirks!
Go check a spot where you see eighty-year-old couples strolling around holding hands. Yоu’ll see that еvеn those men mаrrіеd for 60 уеаrѕ are still lооking. In fact, hе’ѕ probably lооkіng at уоu! Creepy, let’s hope your man is also not looking at 80-year-old women!
Remember, men are simple creatures when it comes to relationships. If you have found a good one, no need to complicate it. Enjoy what you have. Read my section on dangerous lovers (the Nightmare Men). You will be grateful, your biggest problem is Fabio’s flatulence at inappropriate moments!